Please Stop Telling Me to Clean As I Go

Cleaning as you go is a simple enough concept, though if it really were all that simple I don't think people would talk about it all the time. And theydotalk about it. It's the unsolicited advice I get from every dinner guest. "I clean as I go!" they say to me as they scan the dishes in my sink. "You know what you should do? Clean as you go!" What they don't say out loud is "It's disgusting that youdon'tclean as you go," but I get the message—their alarmed eyes say it for them.

So okay, fine, I don't clean as I go. I cook, andthenI clean. When I'm done cooking, my kitchen looks like a professional soccer field after a championship game—bottles and debris everywhere. But so what? There are plenty of situations where we don't clean as we go. At the gym, am I supposed to run to the showers after each exercise? No! I clean at the end. That's the adviceIgive. "Clean at the end!"

I didn't think much about cleaning as I cooked until I moved in with a clean-as-he-goes kind of guy. He contrasted our styles in our second week of living together. "I'm clean-as-I-go," he said smugly (it is impossible not to say these words smugly).Really? I thought but did not say.If you're clean-as-you-go, why do I find myself doing dishes for 30 minutes after we eat?

And that right there sums up my aversion to cleaning-while-cooking. Sure, I could learn to clean throughout the process, but that wouldn't prevent me from having to clean the dinner dishes and silverware after I eat. Why clean multiple times when I can just clean once?

I'll also admit that I used to just notgetit. How does one just stop cooking and start cleaning? Those "I could be scrubbing pots right now!" moments don't happen in my cooking.Because I'm busy cooking.

For example, the other day I was making a tomato sauce. The sauce had only just started simmering; it had 20 or 30 minutes to go. I leaned against the countertop and stared at it, watching it bubble and slowly reduce. Tell me, clean-as-you-goers, when in the world did I have time to wipe down my cutting board?

Oh.

Wait, is it really that simple? I've been wasting precious clean-as-you-go time by literally watching things come to a boil?

Yes and no. After that tomato sauce moment, I tried the clean-as-you-go method of cooking, and I found that it was a little more complicated. "If you have time to lean, you have time to clean" is the clean-as-you-go adage used in the restaurant industry, and it makes a very good point. But it only applies to home cooks when we're doing all theotherthings that restaurants do—namely, starting with a clean kitchen, and dedicating yourself to mise en place.

I'm pretty vigilant about that first thing. A combination of readingAnya Hoffman's very convincing article on the subjectand a deep paranoia about attracting insects and rodents led me to adopt the habit of never, ever going to bed with even a single spoon in the sink. So my kitchen is always clean and ready to be cooked in.

But even starting with a clean kitchen won't matter if you haven'taccepted mise en placeas your clean-as-you-go savior. Only if you prep ahead will you have gaps in your cooking during which to clean. Otherwise, those gaps are filled with chopping onions.

I believe in mise, but as I begrudgingly tried to clean-as-I-cook, I realized I really only believe in it halfway. I often save some tasks, such as chopping herbs for a garnish, or making the sauce that will eventually go on the chicken that's in the oven, for when the cooking process has already started. I think that's an efficient way to cook. I don't want to give it up.

So guess what, dinner guests? I'm not. I'm sticking to my ways. I'm comfortable knowing that while some of you are out there cooking, cleaning, cooking, cleaning, cooking, eating, and then cleaning some more, I'm only cleaning once—and sneaking in some meditative, drink-an-entire-glass-of-wine-while-watching-pasta-boil moments to boot. So go ahead and gawk at the dishes in the sink, but please, don't tell me to clean-as-I-go. I've thought about it. I'm choosing to cook-as-I-go instead.